Sorry For Being Late, I Was Lost in the Wilderness

“It doesn’t matter if you’re a bit late. What matters is you’ve arrived.”

The word’s I’d just read rattled around in my head. I chuckled as I stood up to go change my crying baby’s diaper. And then I stopped dead in my tracks as the thought struck me like a thunderbolt.

All the expectations I had for myself as a young man; all the momentum I squandered time and again; all the advantages and favors I’d wasted; it had all come full circle.

To today.

For years I’d remained my own worst enemy, seemingly sabotaging myself just at the moment when it mattered the most, as if choosing defeat instead of victory. The continued crying snapped me out of my reverie as I went to retrieve the wipes and a fresh diaper. All those hopes and dreams had been like the prodigal son returned from their travels.

You see, a couple years ago, I almost threw it all away. I was unhealthy in every way imaginable; in body, mind, and spirit. I was lost in the Wilderness.

Over the last two years to the week, I’ve been putting myself back together. The pandemic snapped me out of my selfish, little small-minded fantasy land. It was a stark reminder that the world was rapidly changing around me and I was failing to rise to the occasion, failing to be there for people when they needed me the most.

That’s all changed, and life is very different now.

I started going after the things that mattered to me rather than trying to convince the world I already did.

And killed a toxic ego before it killed me. RIP Toxic Ego, you evil son-of-a-bitch. Now we can get back to work.

“It doesn’t matter if you’re a bit late. What matters is you’ve arrive

Leave a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: